December 2008

Funny Christmas Ads

by MomGrind

In case you were at a loss as to what would make your loved ones happy this holiday season, allow me to make a few suggestions, inspired by fifties-era Christmas ads, from advertisers who were clearly out of their minds.

A bathroom scale

No other gift says “I care about you” quite like a bathroom scale.

scale-ad.JPG
Ladies Home Journal, December 1955. Image credit: sugarpie honeybunch

A pillow

The gift the entire family lusts after.

pilllow-adLadies’ Home Journal, December 1952. Image credit: sugarpie honeybunch

An electric range

This is what mother REALLY wants.

electric-range-adHotpoint All-White Automatic Electric Range ad, 1920s. Image credit: bayswater97

A Toaster

Only for the romantic at heart.

toaster adImage credit: Jon Williamson

A Vacuum Cleaner

And you thought a toaster was romantic!

vaccum cleaner adImage credit: Jon Williamson

Cigarettes

The best gift ever: beautifully wrapped cancer sticks.

cigarette-ad.JPGSent via email by Linda Abbit of Tender Loving Elder Care

Socks!

Awesome.

perfect-christmas-giftImage credit: Jon Williamson

chewy chocolate chip cookies

This chewy chocolate chip cookies recipe is based on Nestle’s traditional recipe, with a few changes that make the cookies chewy and nut-free, and add a distinct vanilla flavor and white chocolate chips. The trick to keeping them chewy is simple – under-bake just a little, and let them finish baking outside the oven instead of transferring to a wire rack.

Ingredients

1 cup + 2 TBS all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup white sugar
1/4 cup packed brown sugar
1 large egg
1 TBS high quality vanilla extract
1/2 cup (1 stick) softened unsalted butter
1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1/2 cup white chocolate chips

Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).

2. Mix flour, baking soda and salt.

3. In a separate bowl, mix butter and sugars until well blended. Beat in the egg and vanilla.

4. Add the dry ingredients to the egg mixture and mix just until combined.

5. Add chocolate chips.

6. Shape dough into about 10 balls, using your hands. Sure, it’s a little messy, but this is the kids’ favorite part.  We like to make them large and since I want them to bake evenly, I weigh them on my kitchen scale at about 70 grams each (yes I am insane). If you want more cookies, you can double the ingredients. Place the dough balls about 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet.

7. Bake 10-12 minutes, until light golden brown. The outer edges should just begin to harden but the center should still be soft. Remove from oven and cool on the baking sheet instead of on a wire rack – this is important if you want chewiness.

madonna-olderCredit: madonna-pix

“Madonna’s hands (50) look older than her face!”

“Anna Wintour (59) looks OLD when you magnify her photos to the point of discomfort!”

“Brigitte Bardot (73) is not a bombshell anymore!”

The media is ridiculously obsessed with using the strength of today’s digital cameras to photograph aging female celebrities up close and show us that as you get older, the plumpness and smoothness you used to have in your twenties are gone.

Brigitte Bardot seems to be the worst offender, because while others are cosmetically enhancing their faces, leaving mostly their hands to disclose their real age, Bardot simply refuses plastic surgery. The nerve! “Gone was the trademark pout and cascading blond locks, to be replaced by sagging jowls covered in heavy make-up and a wiry, unkempt patch of graying hair.”

old-brigitte-bardot

brigitte_bardot1

Brigitte Bardot, young and old. 1968, age 34. Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons ; 2006, age 72. Photo credit: John W. Macdonald

Oh PLEASE. Brigitte Bardot is 73 years old. This is what aging looks like when you don’t have plastic surgery or dye your hair. Our notion of what aging looks like has become completely warped because of cosmetic surgery and Botox.

Have you seen Nicole Kidman lately? This is a photo of her from 2006. The actress, who was 39 years old when the photo was taken, looks at least ten years younger than her chronological age. She’s absolutely gorgeous, but people need to realize that a lot of money and effort has been poured into looking so smooth and plump when you’re almost 40. Of course, she’s often criticized for what seems to be her liberal use of Botox. You’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t.

nicole-kidmanPhoto credit: mikegoat

Speaking of wrinkled skin and sagging jowls, Dustin Hoffman, 71, looks old too. Anyone care to write an article about HIS wrinkly appearance?

dustin-hoffmanPhoto credit: wvs

And look at Brad Pitt – he seems to have lost his youthful plumpness, maybe even gained a few pounds. Anyone feels like making fun of HIM?

brad-pitt.JPG young-brad-pitt.JPG
Older Brad Pitt by wvs. Younger Brad Pitt by vstyds.

I didn’t think so.

The pure glee with which these articles are written confuses me, because WE ARE ALL AGING. Why would you make fun of someone for going through a completely natural process – one you’re going through as well?

Ageism, when directed at women, remains the last acceptable form of discrimination in our society. It’s no longer acceptable to criticize people because of their religion, their sexual preference, their weight or their race, but it’s fine – even fun – to berate a 73 years old woman for looking her age.

This photo of me was taken last year in Marseilles, France. Look at those hands! They sure weren’t so veiny when I was 20. Well guess what, I AM NOT TWENTY. I AM 37. I work out, as I should, I am strong and healthy, and since my hands are losing fat layers due to aging, my veins show, especially when it’s hot. What exactly am I supposed to do? Stop exercising? Cover myself with long sleeves regardless of the weather? (Vogue Magazine seems to think this is an acceptable solution).

vered-marseilles-2007

And what should I do as my face progressively shows more signs of aging? Hide behind scarves and sunglasses? Resort to Botox injections and expensive, painful, risky plastic surgery? How do you think the media makes me feel about my own aging? How does it make YOU feel?

By allowing ageism, we have allowed aging to become something women are ashamed of. It makes absolutely no sense.

Brigitte Bardot is not a bombshell anymore, but she is a beautiful woman. She lives her life passionately, refuses to undergo plastic surgery, and when she announces a press conference, she can still pack a room.

If this is not aging gracefully, then I don’t know what is.

castX-Ray Safety became a major concern for me after my daughter broke her elbow two years ago at the playground.

It was relatively serious. The bone had to be manipulated back into place at the OR, under general anesthesia.

She’s fine now. But the injury was bad enough, that we were asked by the orthopedic surgeon to return for a follow-up X-ray every six months. He says that because of the trauma to the bone, it could stop growing at any time, and that would require immediate action.

Today, she had her fourth X-ray.

I trust her surgeon. He’s the very best. The hospital  – Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital at Stanford – is the very best. We discussed X-Ray safety, and the surgeon said the amount of radiation is minimal. It goes to her arm and not to internal organs. Her abdomen is protected. He says not to worry.

But my child is being exposed to radiation every six months.

Today he told me he wants to see her once a year from now on.

I asked, again, about X-ray safety. He reassured me, again.

“But what if I just don’t bring her in anymore? I mean, what would be more risky? Stopping the follow-ups or exposing her to radiation?”

He maintained that the X-Rays are safe.

My own research supports this: the radiation from an X-ray to the arms or legs exposes a person to a few days’ worth of natural radiation (from sources such as the sun). The additional risk of cancer per examination is considered negligible, at less than 1 in 1,000,000.

I marked the date in my calendar and thought: I wish she could make this decision for herself. I hate that I have to make this decision for her. I know that X-rays are considered safe. But there are so many things that doctors and scientists THINK they know, only to find out later they were very wrong. And what if these minimal, safe, recurring amounts of radiation join other factors and cause cancer, many years from now?

I may be paranoid and overprotective. The X-rays may be completely harmless. As parents, we are used to making everyday decisions that affect our children. We HAVE to make these decisions for them. But sometimes, the responsibility for another person’s well-being, for another person’s life, feels like too much.

What would you do?

Photo credit: Brixton

Most Flattering Jeans

by MomGrind

Trying to find truly flattering jeans? Finding a good pair of jeans is not always easy. Which jean style is the most flattering? Which is best avoided? And what do all these terms mean, anyway? Here’s a quick guide to jeans.

Flared Jeans

Flared jeans are narrow along the thigh and knee, widen at the calf and have a wide leg opening. They look great with fitted tops and platform shoes that balance out the flare. The flare on the bottom has a slimming effect on the thighs.
VERDICT: Go ahead.

flare-jeansPhoto credit: Nic Name

Boot Cut Jeans

Bootcut jeans are cut straight at the thigh and flare a little at the ankles. They have a slimming, elongating effect, especially when worn with high heels.
VERDICT: go ahead.

boot-cut-jeansPhoto credit: gohsuket

Skinny Jeans

Skinny jeans are tight jeans that end in a narrow leg opening. Generally, skinny jeans look best on long-legged boyish figures. It’s best to avoid them if you have a fuller figure. This young woman is wearing them very well, with high heels and a tunic:

skinny-jeansPhoto credit: gohsuket

But they can be seriously unflattering:

skinny-jeans.JPG
Photo credit: Malingering

VERDICT: Proceed with caution.

Straight Leg Jeans

Straight Leg Jeans are cut with a narrow, straight leg. The leg does not become wider at the calf or ankles. Just like skinny jeans, these are flattering on boyish figures, not so much on fuller figures.
VERDICT: proceed with caution.

straight-leg-jeansPhoto credit: hyena-in-petticoats

Mom Jeans or tapered jeans

These have a generous cut along the thighs and the behind and become narrower toward the ankle. This look is very unflattering because it makes the thighs and behind look bigger.
VERDICT: best avoided.

mom-jeansPhoto credit: glindsay65

Boyfriend Jeans

Boyfriend jeans are cut with a large waist, loose legs and large pockets. They’re a good choice for fuller figures. Wear them with a fitted top to avoid a slouchy look.
VERDICT: go ahead.

boyfriend-jeansPhoto credit: Idhren

Low Rise Jeans

Low rise jeans are intended to sit low on, or below, the hips. This popular style is flattering only if the waist is not too tight (if it is, you will get a muffin top), and especially if you have a flat or an almost flat tummy.
VERDICT: proceed with caution.

low-rise-jeansPhoto credit: luby

Make sure that the rise is not so low that you show more than you probably intended to show:

super-low-rise-jeansPhoto credit: smadness

High-Waist Jeans

On the opposite spectrum from low rise jeans, these have a waist that is cut high and fully covers the tummy.  These should be worn with a fitted top and look great on an hourglass figure. The main problem with this cut: it makes the thighs and behind look bigger.
VERDICT: proceed with caution.

high-waist-jeansPhoto credit: Minirobot

Wide-Legged Jeans

These are cut narrow in the waist, wide along the hips and thighs and have a wide leg opening. This is a forgiving style if you have large hips and thighs. Just like boyfriend jeans, it’s best to pair them with a fitted top. This style is not flattering to very short women since it tends to make them look even shorter.
VERDICT: proceed with caution.

wide-leg-jeansPhoto credit: coutorture

Distressed, torn, or ripped Jeans

It’s a trend that I don’t really get, but it’s very popular.

This is too much:

very-torn-jeansPhoto credit: malingering

This is too, but she’s young and gorgeous and can pull it off:

cute-torn-jeansPhoto credit: Akbar Simonse
VERDICT: best avoided.

Colored Jeans

These don’t have the classic jean look, and can’t be paired with any color, but they can certainly make a statement.
VERDICT: proceed with caution.

colored-jeansPhoto credit: gohsuket

Cropped Jeans or Capri jeans

Cropped jeans cover about three quarters of the leg. In Capri jeans, the jean ends just below the knees. The main problem with this cut is that it tends to shorten the legs, so it is best worn by women with long, thin legs. So, while the cut looks good on her:

cropped-jeansPhoto credit: Malingering

It is not very flattering on her:

capris.JPG
Photo credit: A Candid Life

VERDICT: proceed with caution.

My favorite jean style: moderately low rise, flared jeans. While bootcut is a classic, always-appropriate style, it seems a bit too conservative and lacks the flare that flared jeans have. :)

woman-reading.JPG
Photo credit: shaycam

I haven’t read a single book since I started blogging nine months ago.

It’s not that I stopped reading. I read more now than I ever have before. But I do all my reading online. Instead of reading books, I read blogs.

People used to worry that the internet would be the end of reading and writing. It wasn’t. We are surrounded by more text than ever before, and since the internet enables people to publish their own material, it is also a great equalizer that enables us to discover writers that we would not have heard of otherwise.

So I’m still an avid reader, right? Perhaps. But some say that “reading” only refers to printed books. That blogs and eBooks are less valuable than printed books. I recently heard an interesting distinction between reading blogs and reading books: online, you SURF. Or maybe SCAN. You don’t READ.

In addition, the very fact that blogs and eBooks are self-published and don’t go through an editorial selection process means that many of them are indeed of a lower quality than printed material. This article is an excellent example: it’s an assortment of ideas – interesting ideas perhaps, but no doubt the writing here is “writing for the web.” Quick, shallow, grammatically challenged and not very polished.

Avital of Creativity Prompt tagged me, ages ago, for a book meme. One of the meme’s questions: has a book ever fundamentally changed the way you see life? My answer: yes, of course. There were several, but most notably, Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment made me realize, during a time of great emotional turmoil as a teenager, how fragile and precious and absolutely wonderful life is:

“Where was it that I read about a man condemned to death saying or thinking, an hour before his death, that if he had to live somewhere high up on a cliffside, on a ledge so narrow that there was room only for his two feet – and with the abyss, the ocean, eternal darkness, eternal solitude, eternal strom all around him – and had to stay like that, on a square foot of space, an entire lifetime, a thousand years, an eternity – it would be better to live so than to die right now! Only to live, to live, to live!”

Can a blog change my life the way a book has? Clay Collins of Finance Your Freedom thinks it can’t. He said a few months ago in a tweet that I marked and saved as one of my favorites: “Several books have changed my life. Forever. A blog’s never had the same impact.”

Over to you now.

Do you read books? Do you think blogs and ebooks are inferior to printed books? Has a book ever changed YOUR life?

Are female athletes judged by performance, or by hotness?

Looking at their skimpy outfits, the answer seems to be clear. Especially when it comes to beach volleyball.

Beach Volleyball

beach-volleyball-women.JPG
Image credit: david.bunting

beach-volleyball-men.JPG
Image credit: david.bunting

As a result, women – and only women – are often photographed from this interesting angle:

female-volleyball.JPG
Image credit: david.bunting

I have yet to see a male player photographed from this angle and at such a closeup.

Runners

Although not as extreme as beach volleyball, female runners are significantly more exposed than male runners.

female-runner.JPG
Image credit: spitfirelas

male-runner.JPG
Image credit: spitfirelas

Tennis

Roomy tees and bermuda shorts for men, tiny skirts and tank tops for women. Awesome.

male-tennis-player
Image credit: mandj98

female-tennis-player.JPG
Image credit: vedia

Google search results

It’s interesting to note, that when I performed a Google search for “female athletes,” six results out of the nine results on the first page were some variation on “Hottest female athletes” (there was a single result for “top earning female athletes”). When I performed a similar search for “male athletes,” there were just three “hot male athletes” results.

Lingerie Football League

lingerie-bowl.JPG
Photo credit: Evan Romine

Inspired by the Superbowl halftime special, The LFL is a ten team league that will begin play in September 2009.

I guess the main question here is why do individual women choose to participate in this?

One possible answer was given elsewhere by one of my readers, Computer Addict. According to him, these women are “willing participants in an enterprise predicated on making money by depicting women as sexual objects.” He continues, “Is that strange? Far less strange than black slave owners, or anti-Semitic Jews. Personal gains, be it money, power or fame, often trump one’s self-identification with class, gender, ethnicity or race.”

What the athletes are saying

I was curious to know how the women feel about their skimpy outfits, so I contacted a few of them. The reaction in general: “this is not sexism. It’s about performance.” Makes sense, until you consider that the men are able to perform just fine with roomier clothes that provide more coverage.

This is what the athletes had to say:

Donna MacFarlane, a high-profile Australian runner, said: “Competition gear is about feeling comfortable and the two piece outfits are usually the best for ease of movement and to cope with hot conditions. I don’t think outfits should be skimpy just for the sake of it. Women have a choice of what they wear- even in major Championships women are allowed to be more covered up if they want, it’s usually just not practical.”

Heather Bravo, a volleyball player, said: “Does it ever bother me? The outfits themselves do not. When I was first starting off yes they did but over the years I have grown accustomed to them. A form of sexism? I would have to say no. It actually is a lot more comfortable to wear short spandex, of course not when your butt is hanging out the bottom but it is actually more comfortable than basketball shorts. As for the last question (I asked her if people would still watch women’s volleyball if the women were dressed more like the men v.d.).. In my heart I would like to say it doesn’t matter, but this 2008 Olympic volleyball teams got a ton of coverage, and some of that might have been due to their outfits, or that the girls were gorgeous. But I think that womens volleyball will be watched because people like to see girls in a competitive light.. In a masculine way. The fact they are in smaller outfits just eggs the guys on.”

Tamao Nakayama, another volleyball player, said: “Does it ever bother you? I choose ones that don’t bother me. I don’t buy the ones that have big decorative materials (metals, beads and such). Bikinis are better than one piece. Sand gets inside while you are playing, and  with a bikini you can get rid of sand easier. Is it a form of sexism? Don’t know about international organizations, but AVP doesn’t require players to wear bikinis. Neither do other American volleyball organizations, I think. My answer is no. Athletes are wearing whatever they are comfortable with. Will people would still watch women’s beach volleyball if outfits were more like men’s outfits? People who love this sport will continue watching. The viewers who just wanted to see hot bodies will stop watching. Let me ask you this. Why there is no ping-pong TV program? Ping-pong has awesome long rallies than beach volleyball, and it’s fun sport to watch. By the way, it’s not only female players that are getting attentions. All male players play without T-shirt in pro tours. Lots of ladies love to watch them. That’s the reality.”

Finally, Renee Cleary, who is also a volleyball player, said: “I don’t feel that wearing bikinis to play beach volleyball is a form of sexism.  As players, we are free to pick any style of bathing suit or clothes to play in.  I believe that the international league (FIBV) has a 4″ maximum on the hip width of the bottom but otherwise all the tournaments in the US allow players to wear outfits of their choice, including one-piece suits, shorts or leggings. Personally, I wear bikinis that are most comfortable for me to play in.  I prefer Brazilian styles because with less material there are fewer places for the sand to get stuck, and it may seem counter intuitive but this style stays in place better for me.  If I’m cold, I play in a long sleeve shirt and pants. I don’t really know if fewer people would watch matches if women’s outfits were more like men’s but as a player I wouldn’t like this because it’s usually very hot and the material would stick to my legs. Also, shorts create terrible tan lines.”

Do you think these women are refusing to acknowledge they’re being exploited? Are they, as Computer Addict said, willing participants? When they choose skimpy outfits, is it a real choice, or do they feel they’re expected to look a certain way? Am I totally off base here and it’s all about comfort and performance?