Ten Ways To Love Yourself As A Woman
Do you love yourself? Do you take good care of yourself and train yourself to ignore the media’s messages about how women are SUPPOSED to look and act?
If you read this blog, I’m guessing you’re already following at least some of the suggestions below, and that’s a very good thing, because while the media constantly tells you to hate yourself and your imperfections, we both know you are wonderful – just the way you are.
10 ways to love yourself as a woman:
1. Throw out your bathroom scales. Seriously. Do it now.
2. Eat well, and never starve yourself. Try to eat five small meals each day, make sure your plate is filled with colorful fruit and veggies before you add protein and starch, and forget about counting calories.
3. Take care of your body. Engage in moderate exercise 3-4 times per week, but find something you actually enjoy doing, and preferably outside in fresh air, such as walking, rollerblading, biking, hiking or skiing. If your schedule only allows you to get fresh air and exercise on the weekend, don’t fret about it too much. Just do your best.
Photo credit: Matt From London
4. Love what you see. When you look in the mirror, train yourself to focus on your best features and ignore your “imperfections.” I read somewhere that when women stand naked in front of a full-length mirror, their eyes are immediately drawn to the areas they’re unhappy with. Shouldn’t we stop doing that?
5. Be nice to yourself. Replace that negative self-talk you’re so good at with positive self-talk. My daughter recently changed the screen saver on her laptop to say “Welcome back. You’re awesome.” Shouldn’t we all follow her example?
Photo credit: lboogiepeace
6. Stop reading women’s magazines. You might think they provide harmless entertainment, but they are damaging your self esteem. Cosmo is notorious for teaching young women that a man’s needs come first, but Vogue and the others are not much better.
7. Take a self-defense class. It’s a great exercise, and the skills you acquire could empower you in dangerous situations.
Photo credit: benjieordonez
8. Educate yourself about advertising, the motives behind it and why advertisers use women’s bodies to sell. Being aware of the messages advertisers in particular, and the media in general, send will help you filter out these harmful messages. Unfortunately, they will continue to shape society’s perceptions of women.
9. Reject the notions that a woman must suffer for beauty, and that “beautiful” has just one definition. During my teens, in the late eighties, I desperately wanted to look like the models I saw on magazine covers: blond, blue-eyed and tan. I hated my dark hair and pale skin. It took me several years to realize there’s more than one way to be beautiful.
10. Support other women. When you support other women, you are supporting yourself. So, when a woman announces she is running for office, try not to shred her to pieces right away. There’s nothing wrong with supporting a candidate “just because she’s a woman,” provided she’s as qualified for the job as other candidates. In most cases, she is.
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Related Reading: Media Portrayal of Women
Next week on MomGrind: 10 Ways To Hate Yourself As A Woman.
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Lance responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 3:07 am →
What a positive message you’re sending – and an important one.
I do think that as a society, we’ve made this more difficult for women to do (to love themselves). Still, though, that doesn’t mean there aren’t things that can be done – like what you’ve mentioned here – to change that. As a man – I think we can help to by supporting the women in our lives that we know. We too are part of the problem, or part of the solution. It’s a choice.
Dominique responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 4:09 am →
Vered,
a very strong message you are sending out. I strongly agree that one should not deem how “good” we are based on standards set by the media or let others make us feel small. We owe it to ourselves to remain positive and brush aside all these harmful negative notions.
janice responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 6:38 am →
I agree with all of those, although I do struggle with #3. Number 9 is really good and needs to be said often, especially by those of us raising tomorrow’s men and women. I’m blessed to have a husband who loves all of me just as I am and he’s sending a great message to my son and daughter.
I’m intrigued about next week’s post…
Lori Hoeck responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 8:51 am →
Hi Vered,
Much needed words for women! Thank you.
And of course I wholeheartedly endorse “Take a self-defense class.” (My website is up, by the way. Woohoo!)
Carla responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 9:28 am →
Number four really hits home to me. Its so easy to focus on the negative or even what we think is negative or wrong. Great reminders!
Tess The Bold Life responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 9:48 am →
No. 4 is what I’m currently doing. It was so much easier when I was younger.
Davina responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 10:33 am →
Hi Vered. Wonderful post here… I’ll be skipping off to Twitter in a moment to announce it. Your daughter’s screen saver is brilliant. And, isn’t it interesting how we tend to be attracted to seeing and judging our faults first? I had a similar conversation with my brother yesterday. He is very self-conscious and we spoke about how he tends to think that when a stranger looks at him they are thinking something negative. He has come to realize that he couldn’t know what they are thinking and why, with so many possible scenarios, he chooses a negative one. And… maybe to consider that while they are looking at him, perhaps they are simply wondering what he is thinking about them.
If You Want To Sell Something To Women, You’d Better Make It Pink | responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:12 am →
[...] Related Reading: Ten Ways To Love Yourself As A Woman Women Around The World: Ten Disturbing Trends Breaking: Cosmo Magazine To Change Its Name Hire Me [...]
Women And Body Image: Ten Disturbing Facts | responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:13 am →
[...] Related Reading: Ten Ways To Love Yourself As A Woman Women Around The World: Ten Disturbing Trends Breaking: Cosmo Magazine To Change Its [...]
MomGrind responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:41 am →
@ Lance: “I do think that as a society, we’ve made this more difficult for women to do (to love themselves).” I agree. There are a lot of messages out there teaching us to hate ourselves – especially how we look.
@ Dominique: I agree, and while it’s not easy, we should at the very least be aware of the media’s messages.
@ janice: Next week’s post is pretty much the opposite of this one. It was very easy to write once I wrote this one.
@ Lori Hoeck: Congrats on the new site! Yes, I knew you’d agree.
@ Carla: It’s an important one for me to, and one I need to be conscious of every day.
@ Tess: It does get harder. But so important for our well-being.
@ Davina: Sensitive, highly self aware people have such a hard time in life. I taught myself over the years that people are just not that interested in me!
apricot tea. responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:44 am →
Great article, Vered. I especially loved how you said to throw away your scales. I don’t own a scale, & I know that if I did, I would be obsessive about how much weight I was gaining/losing. I think it’s a great tip, & I hope people heed your advice.
RC - Rambling Along responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:52 am →
I rather like your daughter’s screensaver – and I’ve made similar ones when I’ve felt down about myself.
Lately, I’ve been really hating my stomach. Even though I have never been thin (not since I was in my early teens), until I had a child, my stomach wasn’t where I tended to hold the extra pounds. I’m working on reminding myself that my abdomen housed a human being – doing what it was meant to do – thus the reason it will never be what it was when I was in my teens and 20s. And I’m trying to remember that most of the fashion models/actresses have access to daily personal training, easy-to-access gyms, and possibly a personal chef.
Sherri (Serene Journey) responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 11:53 am →
Hi Vered,
I really like this post. Women are usually very hard on themselves and pay way too much attention to their physical appearances. I used to read women’s magazines as a teen and into my early 20’s and what a number that did to my self-esteem. I’m now in my thirties and I am not 100% confident or happy with how I look…but I am sooooo much further ahead than I was 10 years ago. I have “imperfections” as does everyone and I’m slowly getting better at accepting them and loving them.
Self defense class is a brilliant idea. I’ve taken Kung Fu and it was one of the more empowering things I’ve done, it was great! Thanks for such a thoughtful post I love it!!
Dr. J responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 12:07 pm →
I’m sending this to the women I know!! Thank you, Vered!
The Stiletto Mom responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 12:21 pm →
Excellent post! And so true all of it. I love nothing more than to pick at myself but I’ve tried to stop it now that my daughter is old enough to realize what I’m doing…I do not want her to grow up with body images like I did!
Mr. Nuggets responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 12:49 pm →
Excellent post, Vered! I love every point you make, but especially number 7 (not my any means to the exclusion of others). I have a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and a yellow belt in 8-Step Praying Mantis Kung Fu. The combination is awesome for this reason: Tae Kwon Do (traditional) taught striking, kicking, blocking. However the Kung Fu teaches grappling and throwing, using body mechanics and physics.
In addition to having training in the psychological aspects of self-defense (ie., avoidance, body language, etc.) find a class that will teach nitty, gritty, down and ugly ways to defend oneself if necessary.
With Tae Kwon Do, a determined attacker could get me unless I’m lucky enough to get a debilitating blow in within the first few seconds. With throwing skills, there is an added dimension; as well as with grappling.
This fear of rape/assault that women have to live with like men do not, brings up intense feelings in me. I wish I knew what I could do to reduce the gene pool of these sub-humans that do this stuff. Castration would be where I would START. Hope that’s not too violent a statement.
If I can get my injuries healed to where I can return to martial arts, it will be with my wife (who has 8 years into goju karate) specifically with the intention of building a curriculum for Women’s Self-Defense.
I tend to blather sometimes. Hope this is not one of them. Point being: find a well-rounded self-defense class that will teach the dirty stuff, imho. You CAN get a black at a reputable school in 3-4 years. Visit numerous schools, avoid those that promise black belts, etc. Then when you find one, stick with it. Once you hit black belt your real learning begins. But, you can be effective way before then.
Tyler - Building Camelot responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 1:02 pm →
Great list Vered – My wife can be so damn hard on herself I wish I knew of a way that, as her husband, I can help boost her self esteem and really let her know that she’s a beautiful and amazing woman.
Friar responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 1:08 pm →
Good list!
Though I think it could have been equally valid to title this “How to love yourself as a person”. Because everything listed here could apply to both sexes.
(Except reading the womens’ magazines, of course)
Michelle @ Find Your Balance responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 2:42 pm →
I totally agree with ditching the women’s magazines. The worst thing I ever did as a teenager was subscribe to Teen Magazine. It totally wrecked my self esteem if I didn’t have that particular shade of lipstick or hair that looked like the model.
Kim Woodbridge responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 3:33 pm →
Yes! Please throw away the crappy magazines …
I disagree a little with the scale and counting calories. By tracking what I was eating on a daily basis I was able to lose 30 lbs and keep it off. I didn’t starve myself but made better choices and mostly continue to eat that way now.
Rowe responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 5:02 pm →
Most men, I have observed, are a lot more content with themselves and care less about similar things the average woman does to the point of ’stressing’ about it. I cannot leave my house without first checking in the mirror. The men in my life – father and adult sons – do not do this. Women’s mags are generally the worst thing for women; we buy them for comfort, for some time-out, but as studies have found usually end up feeling worse about ourselves after reading them. There can be no airbrushing of our very ordinary and ‘unnattractive’ lives in comparison to the ready-to-be photographed models and celebrities staring back at us from those glossy pages.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:11 pm →
@ apricot tea: I must confess I do own a scale, but I rarely weigh myself. I just don’t see the point: if my clothes fit, I’m fine. I do think anyone who obsesses about the number on the scale should get rid of it.
@ RC: You definitely sound like someone who has allowed the media images and “ideals” to influence her. I can’t blame you. I have too. We all have, to some extent. It’s good that you remind yourself that those flat tummies come at a cost – a cost that most ordinary people simply cannot afford.
@ Sherri: “I am sooooo much further ahead than I was 10 years ago.” Me too.
@ Dr. J: Glad you liked it.
@ The Stiletto Mom: I agree: it’s important to accept ourselves for the sake of our daughters too.
@ Mr. Nuggets: Thank you for the advice. You obviously know what you’re talking about.
@ Tyler: Sounds like you’re doing your best.
@ Friar: It’s true. I tend to assume women suffer more than men do from kow self esteem and are more victimized by the media than men are. But no doubt, this is good advice for men too.
@ Michelle: I used to read Glamour and Vogue. It was definitely a mistake.
@ Kim Woodbridge: My husband disagrees with it too. His experience is too that you can weigh yourself daily without becoming obsessed. 30lbs and keeping it off – that’s quite an accomplishment, Kim!
@ Rowe: “I cannot leave my house without first checking in the mirror.” Same here. It’s sad, really.
Daphne @ Joyful Days responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:21 pm →
Vered,
It took me many years (maybe 30) to start liking what I saw in the mirror. I used to think that’s because I was an ugly duckling, who started blossoming late in life to actually look good. In hindsight maybe nothing changed externally, but I started to feel better about myself as a person and therefore liked my reflection more.
You’re doing great work in women’s issues. Keep it up!
Marelisa responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:33 pm →
I think as long as you look clean and healthy, you’re good to go.
However, I do know a lot of women who have a really poor self-image. There’s a beautiful Indian woman in my gym who’s always talking about how depressed she is because she hasn’t lost any weight–she’s perfectly thin–and about getting breast implants. I do my best to try and convince her she looks fine, but the other day she showed up at the gym with tattooed eyeliner on her upper and lower eyelids. She said it hurt like crazy, but then she went back to get a touch up on a tiny little space the beautician missed. Go figure . . .
Stacey / Create a Balance responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:42 pm →
Yes I love myself. Love, love, love, love, love myself. I don’t love my belly, but I know it is part of the package.
Hayden Tompkins responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:46 pm →
What an appropriately selected picture for your point about magazines. It’s pervasive, the idea that women are only valuable for their beauty or as sexual beings. I came across a blog (along the lines of Tucker Max and I won’t even link to it because the last thing this guy needs is more attention) and he had something called a “Kade Scale”. So he could rank women and whether or not they measured up.
The scale (1-10) has this to say about “7’s”
MomGrind responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 7:59 pm →
@ Daphne: Thank you for sharing your personal story. And thank you for the positive feedback. . I enjoy writing about women’s issues because I care so much about this topic.
@ Marelisa: This is so sad. I worry she’ll end up getting the implants, too.
@ Stacey: I’m so proud of you right now!
@ Hayden Tompkins: The guy is an idiot. Thank you for not including a link. I’ll remove his name too. I don’t want to give him any publicity here. What a loser.
Kelly@SHE-POWER responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 8:00 pm →
Here, here Vered. Wish more women would start doing number 10. Women could have so much power and equality in this world if we’d just stop turning on each other and siding with the patriarchy that does not support our interests. Forget the song, “Stand by your man”, ask yourself if he stands by you and if you stand by your sisters.
We will always be the weaker sex while we remain the harshest critics of other women.
Kelly@SHE-POWER
Jannie responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 10:41 pm →
Are YOU going to run for office someday, Vered? I’ll vote for you! In fact, I’d move to wherever you’re living just so I could vote. Love the screen-saver idea! Actually, these are all great. The exercise one made me feel all happy and energized, ready for a wonderful walk / run on the trail tomorrow.
And advertizing lies and distortion, well that could be a whole post, if not a book, in itself.
Bravo! Great post.
Barbara Swafford responds:
Posted: May 31st, 2009 at 10:55 pm →
Hi Vered,
I love what your daughter did on her computer. She’s learning early that we women are awesome and can do anything we set our mind to. I especially love your ideas of supporting other women and stopping the negative talk.
Robin responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 1:49 am →
Hi Vered – I love your list of ways we can love ourselves!
I don’t ever read women’s magazines, but today in the chiropractor’s waiting room I picked one up, and after a few pages I felt it was affecting my self esteem, so I tossed it down and stared out the window instead – much healthier! I loved hearing about how your daughter put the “you’re awesome” screen saver on her computer.
Positively Present responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 4:36 am →
Absolutely LOVE this post. It’s so great. I’m actually starting a new site on female empowerment and I would love to link to your post when the site is up and running. You have some really great stuff in here and I love the way you put it all together. It’s certainly not easy being a woman and it’s great to read inspiring posts like this one. Thank you!
Laurie | Express Yourself to Success responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 5:00 am →
When I feel good, I look good. I learned this when I was feeling awful about myself and found out that I looked just as awful – my friends were actually asking if I was sick. Well, yes I was, but it was emotional that looked physical. The happier I feel the better I look so I don’t think about the bathroom scale (if I had one…) or the magazines. Your suggestions are exactly what we should be doing to feel good and look good.
Writer Dad responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 6:21 am →
Wow, I can almost feel my estrogen flowing. I’m not a woman, but I agree with every one of these. And except for taking a self defense class, I partake in all. The self defense class, incidentally, is only a time issue. I’d love to get my chop sockey on.
Dot responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 7:00 am →
Another great addition to your feminism posts! I’m so glad you’re teaching your daughters how to overcome all the negative messages we get.
Don Mills Diva responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 7:03 am →
Great advice Vered.
And your daughter? She clearly IS awesome.
veena responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 8:34 am →
Great post! Isn’t it sad that a lot of independent, smart , capable women hate themselves and their bodies…..
J.D. Meier responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 9:23 am →
I like when people unleash their best and you nailed some great advice.
A lot of what you hit at comes down to living inside out and improving self-confidence.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 10:08 am →
@ Kelly: I agree. It drives me crazy. I’m not sure why women do that. I suspect years of evolution have taught us to stand by our men as the only way for us to survive. But it’s a different world now and we need to adjust.
@ Jannie: I’m too much of an introvert to ever become involved in politics.
@ Barbara Swafford: My daughter is awesome. Both of them are.
@ Robin: I read women’s magazines at the hair salon. It always gives me great material for the blog.
@ Positively Present: Thank you! Glad you liked it.
@ Laurie: I agree. Nothing is as attractive as self-confidence.
@ Writer Dad: A self-defense class is on my list too.
@ Dot: I’m trying to teach them, especially while they’re young enough and still listen to me.
@ Don Mills Diva: She is.
@ veena: VERY sad.
@ J.D. Meier: Exactly.
Nurit responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 10:14 am →
Thanks, I needed those reminders.
Jennifer Nicole responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 10:25 am →
Yes! I’m so glad to see more posts like this saturating the blogosphere. Thank you for reminding women of ways to showcase their real beauty instead of vying for unattainable standards.
Paisley responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 12:19 pm →
I tend to have a rebellious spirit that was regarded as uppity, odd or annoying but it certainly kept me from succumbing to the dictates of society without find out for myself what they were based on. No way am I going to change my appearance for anyone and certainly not some air-headed magazine run by (very often) a woman editor who doesn’t give a second thought to the young girls and women who are her readers. Oh, except as statistics and money she’s going to bring in.
Mothers and fathers – please, please teach your girls and boys to see beauty in themselves and in others. It’s not to be found in manipulated images.
Thanks for highlighting this Vered and giving practical advice.
Chania Girl responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 1:12 pm →
One of the ironies of my life has been that I was praised for my brains and maturity as a young girl, much more than I was praised for my looks. As a result, for years I assumed (and struggle with the idea) that because my looks were so rarely commented on, I must not be very beautiful at all. I, therefore, made being physically attractive my focus and even now still spend more time than I should obsessing about how fat or thin I am, how my skin is, if I look okay. For a woman with two degrees who is living on the other side of the world, this is a bit silly, and I know it.
It has been of immense help to me that I cannot read the Greek fashion magazines and that the English ones cost a fortune. This eliminates a lot of compare/contrast and also protects me from the negative messages of the media. I also live a healthier lifestyle now and eat far more fruits and vegetables and whole foods. The negative self talk? That’s next …
Something I am good at? Being nice to myself. I do try to be my own best friend.
Thank you for this one.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 2:45 pm →
@ Nurit: Me too.
@ Jennifer Nicole: “vying for unattainable standards.” I like this sentence. I may borrow it for a future post.
@ Paisley: “Mothers and fathers – please, please teach your girls and boys to see beauty in themselves and in others. It’s not to be found in manipulated images.” Amen.
@ Chania Girl: “The negative self talk? That’s next …” – I’m still working on this one too.
Patricia responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 4:40 pm →
Such a good article Vered, you just put it right on the line and show us how it is done. Bravo and already your kiddos are picking up the good things.
All people need to know that beauty is about so many things in your life – it is a package deal and anytime one is singled out for just a partial aspect the whole is diminished.
We are all the servants to making our world a better place, there is nothing more beautiful that someone using their talent, their wholeness to accomplish that task.
Thank you for sharing and reminding us Vered – you have a remarkable talent which you generously share.
The Lawyer Mom responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 4:47 pm →
I can follow all of these suggestions . . . except one. No scales? Check. What are scales, anyway? And exercise? Check-ish-sort-of-ish. Does tennis once a week count? Ditch the women’s mags? Check again. Haven’t picked one up in years.
But train my eyes not to go straight to my extra chin and other “extra” stuff when I look in the mirror? Umm, that’s going to take some work.
MommyNamedApril responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 7:25 pm →
only ten ways to hate yourself? LOL
Squawkfox responds:
Posted: June 1st, 2009 at 9:43 pm →
11. Keep Your Tits Real
I seriously don’t understand how stuffing oneself with silicon is sexy. So yeah, definitely ditch the magazines and get real with beauty. Love you!
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 at 10:58 am →
@ Patricia: I agree that beauty is a package and not just a single aspect.
@ The Lawyer Mom: Then work on that! You have things that you like too, right? Look at them instead of at the things you don’t like. I sometimes watch my husband as he looks in the mirror. Men do it naturally: they ignore the “bad” parts and mostly focus on the “good” parts.
@ MommyNamedApril: Hehe I know what you mean.
@ Squawkfox: Amen.
Natural responds:
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 at 5:51 pm →
Also, sometimes we have to be selfish. we have to put ourselves first or really, nobody will be happy.
Don’t stop being YOU. A lot of women define themselves by their relationships. They will say “I am a mother, wife, friend, sister, daughter.” Those things are true, but I still ask them “who are YOU.” Not what you are to other people.
Natural responds:
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 at 5:52 pm →
oh yeah and can you fix my typos. please
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 at 7:13 pm →
@ Natural: Fixed.
I loved your comment. I agree with every word.
Tricia responds:
Posted: June 2nd, 2009 at 7:54 pm →
Great post, Vered. I ‘m too guilty of not following some of this list, but honestly, wholly, working my way through it.
Cath Lawson responds:
Posted: June 4th, 2009 at 5:38 pm →
Hi Vered – I wish they’d put this article in Cosmo – but they wouldn’t dare. I confess – I caved in and bought it the other day, for the first time in months, because I wanted to read the Jennifer Aniston interview. But Cosmo had airbrushed her pics so much, she barely looked like herself.
I love your daughter’s screensaver by the way – I think I’ll definitely get one of those.
Paul Maurice Martin responds:
Posted: June 4th, 2009 at 6:20 pm →
Refreshing to see this sort of outlook stated today. In the late sixties through the mid seventies America seemed on track with having its consciousness raised about women but seems like since about the start of the Reagan presidency there’s been a cultural shift not for the better. Though women have continued to make advances professionally and economically, it seems to have become more culturally acceptable to endorse attitudes that used to be described in terms of “male chauvinism.”
Jewel/Pink Ink responds:
Posted: June 5th, 2009 at 1:02 am →
Okay, I’m good on 6…but number 1 is my biggest hang-up.
And it is no fun passing on the Twix at the grocery store. But I do think that de-toxifying oneself of junk food can make one feel better.
That aside, this is a great list! TY.
Good Reading This Week « Too Full Of Hands responds:
Posted: June 5th, 2009 at 9:42 am →
[...] 10 Ways To Love Yourself As A Woman – MomGrind [...]
Meaghan responds:
Posted: June 5th, 2009 at 5:42 pm →
What a great post! Thanks for sharing!
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 5th, 2009 at 8:32 pm →
@ Tricia: Me too!
@ Cath Lawson: “Cosmo had airbrushed her pics so much, she barely looked like herself.” Why am I not surprised.
@ Paul Maurice Martin: I agree – there seems to be a backlash against feminism.
@ Jewel/Pink Ink:I’m glad you’re not reading women’s magazines! They are so damaging.
@ Meaghan: Glad you liked it.
Lilly responds:
Posted: June 6th, 2009 at 12:19 am →
This is a great post and we need to remind ourselves of this over and over again!! And make sure we are great role models for young girls too.
Tiara the Merch Girl responds:
Posted: June 6th, 2009 at 12:38 am →
Great post, but just to let you know: your ads are showing messages for How To Look Like A Fitness Model In 60 Days or Less. I’m not sure that’s the sort of thing you want to support especially on a post like this!
MomGrind responds:
Posted: June 6th, 2009 at 12:49 pm →
@ Lilly: I completely agree about being a good role model to young girls.
@ Tiara: I try to add weight loss ads, as well as other types of offensive ads (such as cosmetic surgery ads) to my ad filter, but it usually takes a few hours until they disappear. I am always grateful to my readers for letting me know when they come across an offensive ad, so thank you!
10 Ways To Hate Yourself As A Woman | responds:
Posted: June 7th, 2009 at 7:27 pm →
[...] you read my previous post on how to love yourself as a woman, you can probably skip this [...]
Tracy responds:
Posted: June 8th, 2009 at 6:45 pm →
Ha! I should have read this one first (I am catching up on my reader!). I totally agree that supporting other women is one of the best ways we can make ourselves feel stronger and happier.
So many women I know neglect themselves to take care of their families. I understand where they are coming from, but the greatest gift I could give my boys is a healthy, happy mother.
Lucia responds:
Posted: June 16th, 2009 at 6:42 pm →
i love this…. as women i think the one thing we really need to work on is loving ourselves the way we are
personally ive always struggled with the “ideal beauty” notion becuase im very fair skinned, reddish hair, large hands, freckles, etc. not exactly what you see advertised in fashion and makeup ads. but because of it i feel special in a way.
I used to cover myself in makeup, wear fake tanning creams, and try to color over the red in my hair.
i used to wear high heels a lot as well (nothing wrong with that , of course)
But this summer i got to thinking, why am i doing all this? for me? for other people? my boyfriend hates makeup, heels, etc. hes all into natural look and the like…
So i have given up makeup for the next month. just to see the real me, and get used to it. Im 18 for goodness sakes i might as well wait and wear it when i “need” it someday.
And as for the heels, i got really wide feet, and i was cramming them into heels, and the things are so painful, i cant run in them.
So i sold them
Now i have $20 to do somethign a lot more fun, like buy a new dress, or go out to dinner
I dont worry about my weight, either. I used to be sooo worried about finally hitting the 100 pounds mark, but after meeting my bf, he gave me a reality check- i was WAY to thin
So now i am 30 pounds heavier and very happy
Lori in Denver responds:
Posted: June 16th, 2009 at 9:51 pm →
My husband and I once spent 2 years in a country where we were illiterate in the local language. That meant that for 2 years we were effectively not marketed to! We were good enough and had enough.
It was culture shock to come back to the barrage.
These are great tips.
Owning Self-Confidence, Owning Self-Love, Owning Pink: My entry into the “Pink Posse” team, by Fred Krazeise | OwningPink responds:
Posted: June 21st, 2009 at 10:50 am →
[...] is Vared DeLeeuw. She writes a funny, witty and poignant blog titled “Mom Grind.” Read her post, “Ten Ways to Love Yourself as a Woman.” Read it, accept it, and own it. I cannot add any [...]
Cindy responds:
Posted: July 24th, 2009 at 5:31 pm →
When you have a past history of people telling you in different ways that you are not worth much then you live that lie, there is nothing else you know except that! How can one love themselves if they have never been shown love nor have they been taught how to love. You can not love others until you know how to love yourself! I have that problem, at 37 I don’t know how to love. I am confused on what is right and wrong and what is healthy in any relationship I get into. I question myself and my partners love everyday, “is this love? Is this healthy? My partner thinks so but myself….well, I need for him to show me EXTRA attention in order to fill this hole inside me, he on the other hand thinks thats not healthy. What it comes down to, I don’t love myself, therefore I need others to show me love to fill that emptyness…that isn’t healthy. Learning how to love myself regardless of what I may think others think of me is the most scariest and difficult task I have ever had to do. It tears me up inside trying to find something good about me but i’m trying and I will eventually love myself for who I am one day!!! Gee while writing this has giving me a little boost lol Thanks guys!!!!
sandie responds:
Posted: August 4th, 2009 at 1:07 pm →
I don’t have a bad image of me beacuse I know those women that appear on magazines are airbrushed. I like my body, I work out to make it better but I am not seeking perfection because nobody is perfect. I accept who I am and work and improve what I have. Thanks for this post!
sonya responds:
Posted: September 17th, 2009 at 8:55 pm →
I was sitting browsing through the internet hoping to find some self help ideas,to better deal with myself (suffering with arthritis @ the age of 44).To learn to cope with the pain and still enjoy life and not use this a an crutch. I found this page to be very helpful and informative…
THANKS
MomGrind responds:
Posted: September 17th, 2009 at 9:18 pm →
Glad you find it helpful Sonya.
In Another’s Nest: Link Love | The Demoiselles responds:
Posted: January 14th, 2010 at 6:21 pm →
[...] Grind celebrates all ages, shapes and sizes with 10 Ways to Love Yourself As A Woman. (We love number [...]