Control a Woman Remote Control
From the product description on Amazon:
“How many hours have you spent puzzling over the mystery of the wonder that is women? Now you need waste no more time understanding the strange phenomenon of the female species when you can control them, and all from the comfort of your arm chair.
Such life essentials as beer, sex and food are all available at a touch of the button. Not forgetting the all important mute button, because if she looks good why ruin it with those pesky opinions.
Our Control-a-woman is a truly life-enhancing gift, if only it worked. No batteries required – powered by positive thinking!”
—
Yes, it really does say that, right there in black and white on the Amazon page. And no, I don’t care if this is “just a joke” and I am in no way going to “lighten up” and laugh about it.
In contrast, the Amazon page for “Control a Man” remote does not feature insulting promotional text, and if you think it makes things “equal,” think again: while the “Control a Woman” remote is aimed at making a woman serve you, have sex with you and shut up, the “Control a Man” remote is aimed at making him propose, talk about his feelings, and buy you chocolate and flowers. This is easily one of the most stereotypical, gag-inducing products I have ever seen.
One of the things that bothers me the most about humans, after their inherent cruelty, is the “gender wars.” It bothers me because I don’t see why we can’t see beyond each other’s sex and focus on each other’s humanity. The “female species?” How about the “human species.” We are not that different and as I said before on this blog, women are no mystery. The answer to the question “what do women want” is quite simple actually. We want exactly what men want. We want justice, equality and respect.
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Bonnie Gray | FaithBarista responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 9:23 am →
Vered, Vered, Vered. A voice crying out in the wasteland of gender wars. What a gem you are. Now, I can tell you how sad this post made me. It’s good you blogged it though. It makes me want to hug my Hubby and all the good Hubbies my friends have. We’ve got to appreciate the good, to outshine the bad. Just makes me sick. Never take anyone for granted, male or female. There are apparently people who don’t have the humanity to be human. Happy Monday, nonetheless, dear friend.
Kim Woodbridge responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 9:36 am →
Yuck – I think anyone who thinks it is funny is probably the same person who thinks Howard Stern is funny. And you know to stay far far away. Based on my recent dating experiences I would have to question if men want the same thing women want – maybe the good ones that I haven’t really found. It seems all they want so far is to know my bra size.
Tara@Sticky Fingers responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:07 am →
I blow a big fat raspberry in the general direction of both of those products.
Utter trash.
Grrrr!
The Stiletto Mom responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:12 am →
I’d love to sit here and tell you I’m shocked, but I’m not. Sadly.
Tracy responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:20 am →
@Kim, you know, you reminded me of a story I read once about a beautiful Hollywood actress who sat at home all night because the only guys who would ask her out were the ones who were extremely cocky and full of themselves. Nice, normal guys figured they had no chance. Then she went on to marry Mel Brooks, I think.
NOT saying you’re going to marry Mel Brooks, just I think that sometimes the deluded are the ones that push themselves forward.
@Vered, I agree. You know, I am all for humor and I dislike being uptight, but so much of this gender humor is not only offensive, it’s hackneyed and only good for a cheap laugh.
Noble Savage responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:22 am →
Ugh. Double ugh. Who buys (and makes) this crap?
Marelisa responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:33 am →
Yeah, I don’t think they’re going to sell too many of those. Products like these appeal to the lowest common denominator.
Mike Goad responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:35 am →
Trashy marketing of trashy humor gimmicks for trashy people.
I’d like to think that no one would get a kick out of these. Unfortunately, I know a few people who would — at least a couple of whom are close kin to me.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:51 am →
Kim, you made me laugh out loud.
Keep looking – there ARE good, decent, caring men out there.
I find it funny that the Adsense ad network has decided to place ads for bladder control products on this page. Gotta love contextual advertising.
Computer Addict responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 10:59 am →
You could take heart in the fact the the Women RC costs $12, while the Man RC is only $9 – apparently men are easier to control w/o the remote. But seriously – it’s joke. Like many jokes, it is immature and somewhat tasteless, but it’s just a joke. I am willing to bet that both the Women RC and Man RC are bought almost exclusively by men – and they give the Male model to their spouse. I know you said you won’t – but please consider lightening up.
Dr. J responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 11:14 am →
How do you find these things??
Yes of course, we all want to love and be loved!
My good buddy, a psychologist, has often talked to me about the unfortunate issues of power and control.
Shevonne responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 12:39 pm →
Ewwwww…those remotes are awful. I wonder who would actually buy one
Dot responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 12:47 pm →
I’ve seen few things as tacky as this, especially in this day and age. In fact, I’m almost tempted to call for a boycott of Amazon (call where?). This reminds me of how some people think that making men sex objects will overcome women’s objections to being made into sex objects. Thus, we had Playgirl alongside Playboy. However, women didn’t want to make sex objects out of men, so now who buys Playgirl? Men, gay men.
I agree that most women want justice, equality and respect, but I have another thought. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems to me that a large number of men at some point in their lives want a type of relationship (superficial, without commitment, and sexual) that a large number of women don’t want or only want for a short time.
Men wanting that isn’t inherently wrong, just as it isn’t inherently wrong to want sex to last two minutes. The genders are different, and there can be, but doesn’t have to be, conflict in that. There can be compromise instead.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 1:14 pm →
Dot, I don’t disagree that genders are different. Just want men to respect us as we respect them, and as you say, most of us are not interested in turning men into objects.
Hayden Tompkins responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 2:03 pm →
The interesting thing about “gender wars” are that while every culture has distinctively masculine or feminine attributes, these attributes are not the universal. Sexual promiscuity, for example.
In our culture, men are usually portrayed as the gender more likely to be sexually promiscuous. (That is, unless you watch porn, of course.) In some middle eastern cultures, however, women are usually portrayed that way and that “understanding” informs much of the social dynamic.
RC - Rambling Along... responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 2:15 pm →
I’m lacking an opinion.
When I see these things, they don’t insult me as much as I figure they are a waste of my time and energy in reacting. Just like when I respond to a naughty child, sometimes I refuse to rise to the bait. Maybe if we don’t react, they (the creators of said product) won’t get the attention they are craving with such a product and it (this portrayal of the genders) will go away?
Just a thought… (As for those who find it funny, they aren’t worth my time and energy either, in this regard. Sadly, I know quite a few people who would laugh.)
The Lawyer Mom responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 2:25 pm →
Frightening that there’s a market for this stuff.
Jeffrey Levine responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 3:11 pm →
wow…love seeing you that passionate…even when it’s passionately angry…please, DONT lighten up!
Cath Lawson responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 3:16 pm →
Hi Vered – This is totally unbelievable. When I saw your link on Facebook – I thought it was going to be some sort of joke. I never imagined for one minute that Amazon would sell this sort of sh..e. I feel like boycotting them.
Carrie responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 3:56 pm →
Good lord. Tasteless, yes. But if you had something to actually WORRY about in the course of your day, trash like this wouldn’t even be a blip on your radar. I’ve been reading here for months and I can’t stomach it any more. As a woman, I want all of the respect I deserve but you making a mountain out of a molehill and screaming inequality from the hilltops just makes women seem MORE nagging and hysterical than any man could do. I earned a PhD in a field that is extremely male dominated and I have never found that I was objectified or treated as less than I deserved, mostly because I didn’t whine about how hard it was to be a woman all the time.
Patricia responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 4:03 pm →
Vered,
Yucky stuff, but I am sure I know a couple of “grown” boys who would give this to their friends. I don’t think any of the women I know would find it funny, then again?
Thank you for sharing this and keeping us aware
MomGrind responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 5:07 pm →
Carrie, I’m so glad you finally came to your senses and decided to unsubscribe. You’ve been reading this crap for MONTHS? You’re my hero.
BunnygotBlog responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 6:16 pm →
These remotes remind me of the movie Click. The guy I was dating that the time thought it would be perfect if he had one to control me. Needless to say he is history.
Kelly@SHE-POWER responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 6:54 pm →
Carrie
Wow you’re my hero too if you have managed to be treated as an asexual equal by every man you’ve ever met. To be so unaffected by all the blatant sexist advertising and products Vered has bought to our attention that you actually think she has a problem rather than our determinedly male dominated society.
It must feel good to sit up there next to your male colleagues knowing that the rest of us are at fault because we don’t think it’s funny that some men would actually buy this stupid gimmick.
Maybe you even like seeing naked female bodies advertising mobile phones/beer/cars and you’re going to be first in line to buy your daughter a pole dancing doll. Or maybe you’re just one of those women that thinks as long as you can bust balls and make the men respect you then bugger all the other women out there who have to suffer through sexism and discrimination.
Either way, sayonara sister. You’re at the wrong blog. We actually give a shit here.
MomGrind responds:
Posted: September 21st, 2009 at 7:37 pm →
Kelly, thank you for saying what I was thinking – and decided for various reasons not to say. You are far more eloquent than I am anyway.
Davina responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 12:29 am →
Hi Vered.
There are two issues here: gender/equality issues and humour.
I have a wacky sense of humour and I have to admit that I can see the “attempt” at humour here. However, there is an art to good humour and this falls miles flat. Granted, we can find other things to make fun of other than gender and equality, but if this were well done and did actually tickle the funny bone, gender wouldn’t even be the issue — humour itself would be.
Like how we find things funny in cartoons for example… it’s not the activity itself that is funny, it’s the humorous way it is presented that makes it funny. Lord knows why it’s funny when the coyote on the Bugs Bunny Show falls off a cliff for the millionth time — splat! Humour is an art form — another arena all itself, and apparently wasted on this product. This is just plain tacky and juvenile — a failed attempt. If I were given this as a gift I would not find it funny at all.
What bothers me is that our resources are being wasted on stupid items such as this. Bottom line here — agreed: “I don’t see why we can’t see beyond each other’s sex and focus on each other’s humanity.”
Jannie Funster responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 3:55 am →
Go Kelly-She Power!
Go, Vered! Obviously your blog’s getting real big now when personal attackers come out. Rock on with your passion!
And for crying out loud, with all the useful things one could actually buy in life, what a waste of money on junk that only stands to perpetuate sexist roles, Do we really want kids, who are still discovering their identities, to see these and think that’s how roles should be? Degrading to both sexes in my opinion.
Sonia responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 4:11 am →
I find it amusing as to how the “women species” are always made out to be the ones who are a pain in the sense of nagging, PMS, whining etc. Many of the men i have come across have been the same in the fact that they will whinge and whine over nothing and oh not the forget the male PMS, when they’ve had a bad day at work and you greet them with “hi darling how was your day” and get completely blown through the window. Men and women are just the same and have the same traits, it doesn’t make either one bad.
Ash responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 9:16 am →
A trashy sexist pretty unfunny joke, yes but it’s still just a joke. It’s not big enough to get fussed and bunched up about.
Avani Mehta responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 10:36 am →
People actually buy this kind of stuff? Unbelievable! The idea is amusing. I just wish they had given some different functionality.
May responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 11:19 am →
Great post! I totally agree and am so sick of people acting like we’re not a HUMANS! It’s so ridiculous and damaging. Urgh.
Lance responds:
Posted: September 22nd, 2009 at 8:24 pm →
You’d think we’re on a higher, more developed plane than this. That we, as human beings, would see things like respect and honor as qualities to aspire to.
Natural responds:
Posted: September 23rd, 2009 at 3:14 am →
okay i did crack a smile. as bad as these controls are, that’s the way some people see the male and female relationship. in the past, that’s what a woman did and sometimes even today, whether we know it or not, we serve our men. we do or try to do what makes them happy, (make breakfast, iron clothes, assist them by working at home, preparing meals) but not in a demeaning way. i don’t mind “serving”, but i also expect to be served as well. we should be helpers to each other.
Dot responds:
Posted: September 23rd, 2009 at 8:19 am →
@Kelly – I second Vered’s comment to you!
@Lance – Some of us (myself not included) truly are “on a higher, more developed plane” — you, for example.
Bauglir responds:
Posted: October 26th, 2009 at 9:55 pm →
I agree that, in all likelihood, the reasoning behind the products arose from stereotypical thinking of the kind you describe (and I also agree that such thinking is dangerously stupid).
On the other hand, note that the Control a Woman remote includes stereotypical depictions of a man’s desires; just as much as the Control a Man remote insults women by pigeonholing them into pre-defined gender roles in terms of desires, the Control a Woman remote insults men by insinuating that sex and booze are the only driving forces behind male decision-making, which I assure you is not the case.
[bad joke]We also like money and explosions.[/bad joke]
Man responds:
Posted: October 27th, 2009 at 1:00 pm →
Ive never seen such a collection cold hearted women commenting. These things are what people call jokes. They are meant for entertainment value and sometimes (such as this) a social cometary. They are in no way meant to be taken seriously. Take the stick out and laugh.
Sources: common sense.
Patricia responds:
Posted: October 27th, 2009 at 3:11 pm →
@ Man
I think you have it wrong…this post and comments are social commentaries. I have three daughters and I do not think this is funny for either sex as it promotes stereotypes and negative thinking which is no laughing matter.
Man responds:
Posted: October 27th, 2009 at 5:26 pm →
Thankyou, you have more than made my point.
Man2 responds:
Posted: October 29th, 2009 at 10:53 pm →
Couldn’t agree more, Man. I always find it incredible how people get all fired up over these simple things… Lighten up, ladies, stereotypes are not wrong when used on jokes. That said, gender jokes are usually very lame, like this on, but there’s no need to be offended…
Rita responds:
Posted: November 21st, 2009 at 9:23 am →
Vered, Is there a button that makes women wear their thong underwear properly?
jeff responds:
Posted: December 17th, 2009 at 2:43 pm →
you women need to stop whinging and get back in the kitchen
just over a breakup responds:
Posted: December 23rd, 2009 at 2:25 pm →
“We want exactly what men want. We want justice, equality and respect. ”
Yeah right. And when you get that, you “don’t feel like being a woman besides us. You want a man, “who is strong, and near whom you can be weak”
Vincent responds:
Posted: December 25th, 2009 at 9:21 am →
GREAT! I will get one for every 1st generation feminist I know, it will surely offend them and let them know just what I think of their outdated gender war ideas.
tracey responds:
Posted: May 26th, 2010 at 6:24 pm →
Thank you so much for this post!! I’m so glad I’m not the only person feeling this way! I’m currently sending Paper Source a petition to stop this stupid remote control from being sold at their arts and crafts store for Father’s Day. I’m a college student and I have taken many sociology classes. I wish these guys who commented earlier could take some of these classes, so they could understand why these remotes are not funny. But it is easy for men who have been dominant throughout civilization to say chill relax no big deal. They have never been physically assaulted or forced to do anything by a guy. I was with a guy who got seriously violent. What would Jeff, Man, Man 2 understand about the fear that crosses your mind as you get beaten and taken advantage. Everything starts small..look at the genocide in Rwanda..”oh so funny look at those people! they are like cockroaches”…it then resulted in 800,000 people dead. people do not think racism is different from sexism…it is all the same..To the boys who find this funny…show some respect for yourself. This is putting you down as well..Do you seriously want to be categorized as a control freak who wants nothing but to tear the clothes off women? Think of your mothers and sisters? Would you want guys treating them likes toys? Laugh all you want but who is the one that took care of your ass? who fed you, comforted you when you fell and cried? Your mother. Women do more work then men in the world. Show some respect!